Breaking the Habit
by Baby Rose
Summary: A Zell based music video, to Linkin Park's, Breaking the Habit. Reposted because the last one didn't show up for some reason. Zell is having some problems with greif...R for drug use and death.


Disclaimer: I don't own FF8 or Linkin Park's song, "Breaking the Habit."

Author's Notes: My second try at a music video, hopefully this one is much improved. I know the recurring theme in my songfics and music videos is suicide…but I'm not really suicidal! Lol, it just makes it more powerful. I highly recommend listening to this song while reading; it will help see the video as it goes along a lot more. There was some conflict in the lyrics, but I went to the LP site itself, so these are correct. Special thanks to my girly Wolfy for the ending inspiration. Love you always, girl!!!

Breaking the Habit

****

(As the intro music starts, Zell is seen laying sprawled out across an unmade bed, a distant look in his emerald eyes. Empty bags and devices are scattered on the bed, clearly all of them have been used up. The camera pans around his room, lingering on possessions such as his gloves, pictures of him and his grandpa, and pictures of him with his ma. They look happy, all of them.)

~*Memories consume*~

(Next we see pictures of the rest of the FF gang. Only two are missing after a few pictures)

_~*Like opening the wound*~_

(Squall and Irvine are missing)

_~*I'm picking me apart again*~_

(We leave Zell for a moment and travel outside where Rinoa, Quistis and Selphie are at the door, greeted by his mother. She tries to be friendly, but obviously something is bothering her.)

_~*You all assume*~_

(She ushers them inside and gestures toward Zell's room, speaking to them)

_ ~*I'm safe here in my room*~_

(Back to Zell, who still lays on the bed. He looks over.) 

_~*Unless I try to start again*~_

(We zoom in on Squall's gunblade and Irvine's jacket…two of his friend's closest possessions) 

_~*I don't want to be the one*~_

(Tears form in his eyes as he looks at them)

_~*The battles always choose*~_

(He flashes back to the double funeral, much tears and pain)

_~*Cuz inside I realize that I'm the one confused*~_

(Shortly after, we see him first buying the bags of green substance. The singer comes out of the shadows of an alleyway, carrying the bags)

_~*I don't know what's worth fighting for*~_

(He hands the singer the money nervously)

_~*Or why I have to scream*~_

(Staring at the bags with wide eyes, he quickly leaves the alleyway, the singer smirking at his back)

_~* I don't know why I instigate*~_

(Later on, still in flashback, Zell is fighting with his ma. She yells, he yells back. His eyes are bloodshot and his complexion is pallid. She's worried about him)

_~*And say what I don't mean*~_

(She reaches out to touch him and he shoves her back against the wall. She begins to cry, and he runs upstairs to his room)

_~*I don't know how I got this way*~_

(Back to the present, he gets up from his bed slowly, looking more awful than before)

_~*I know it's not alright*~_

(He goes up to the gunblade and jacket)

_~*So I'm breaking the habit*~_

(He stares at them for a moment before putting on the jacket and picking up the gunblade)

_~*I'm breaking the habit…tonight*~_

(Cut to Rinoa, Quistis and Selphie coming up the stairs as he lifts the gunblade and looks at its shining surface.)

_~*Clutching my cure*~_

(He goes over to the dresser and pulls out a full bag of green flakes and joints. There is a knock at the door, and he goes over, bag in hand, and locks it securely.)

_~*I tightly lock the door*~_

(He turns away from the door, cut to the three girls outside looking confused. They call his name, but no one answers.)

_~*I try to catch my breath again*~_

(He stares at the gunblade to the single pictures of Squall and Irvine.)

_~*I hurt much more than any time before*~_

(A single tear rolls down his pale cheek at memories of his friends)

_~*I have no options left again*~_

(Looking down at the drugs in his hand, he grabs a lighter)

_~*I don't want to be the one*~_

(He lights the joint, and breathes in deeply, coughing a little afterward.)

_~*The battles always choose*~_

(The girls outside his room are now knocking on his door desperately, still calling his name, wondering why he won't answer their calls)

_~*Cuz inside I realize that I'm the one confused*~_

(He finishes the joint and tosses it in the trash carelessly. He yells toward the door, but we can't hear what he calls. His lips read something along the lines of, "Go away.")

_~*I don't know what's worth fighting for*~_

(When the knocking doesn't cease, he begins to get angry. He starts throwing things at the door and screaming toward it)

_~*Or why I have to scream*~_

(Cut to the girls, backing away from the door in fear)

_~*I don't know why I instigate*~_

(Still full of rage and power, he puts on his gloves, eyes wild with fury)

_~*And say what I don't mean*~_

(He begins punching the pictures of him and his grandpa, along with the ones of him and his ma. The ones of Rinoa, Quistis and Selphie he smashes as well, but the two single pictures of Squall and Irvine he spares, stopping his rampage for a moment to look at them)

_~*I don't know how I got this way*~_

(He seems to be reminiscing for a moment on how things were before)

_~*I'll never be alright*~_

(Another flashback to his friends getting worried about him. They try to reach out to him, just like his ma, but he pushes them away)

_~*So I'm breaking the habit*~_

_~*I'm breaking the habit…tonight*~_

(Suddenly making a decision, he takes a last look at the gunblade before plunging it into his abdomen)

_~*I'll paint it on the walls*~_

(He leaves it in his gut for a moment before pulling it out, blood smeared across it)

_~*Cuz I'm the one at fault*~_

(His eyes are quickly losing life as he picks up the photo of Squall)

_~*I'll never fight again*~ _

(Still holding the frame, he tears off his boxing gloves to hold it better)

_~*And this is how it ends*~_

(He stares at it for a moment, and then loses his hold on it, death grabbing him in its clutches)

_~*I don't know what's worth fighting for*~_

(The frame crashes to the ground, broken glass flying up)

_~*Or why I have to scream*~_

(Zoom in on the photograph of Squall, the glass shards around it smeared with Zell's blood)

_~*But now I have some clarity *~_

(Zoom in on Zell's body, on the floor, open, empty eyes staring up at the ceiling)

_~*To show you what I mean*~_

(Cut outside to the girls, who are still trying to get in)

_~*I don't know how I got this way*~_

(Zell's ma brings them the key to his room, looking frantic)

_~*I'll never be alright*~_

(Her shaky hand jiggles in the lock before the door opens)

_~*So I'm breaking the habit*~_

(They try to open the door through the clutter of the mess in his room. All of their eyes widen with terror as they see him lying on the floor, dead.)

_~*I'm breaking the habit*~_

(His ma covers her mouth and begins crying, trying to get out of the room to escape the scene. Rinoa, Selphie and Quistis go over to his body, kneeling in front of him and sobbing.)

_~*I'm breaking the habit…tonight*~_

(He's finally free from the pain. Camera zooms out to cover the whole room and the four people left in it. Fade out.)


End file.
